Today, everybody got mail asking them to list out the reasons why the Monday Morning Meeting has not been held in a long while. They were told they could be as witty as they want to be. Here's the first salvo.
1. We are too lazy to walk up to the conference room... which is a tiring 20 steps away.
2. We usually sleep walk into the office. By the time we wake up fully, it's Tuesday!
3. We are flogged to work the moment we step in by They Who Must Not Be Named.
4. We are so drunk on Sunday that by the time, the hangover goes... it's time to get drunk again.
5. We are bunch of workaholics and don't let unproductive things like a Monday Morning Meeting to get in our way.
6. We get a nervous breakdown, just thinking about who'd win the sword this week.
7. The computer gets a virus every Monday... because we leave it outside every Sunday.
8. The smell from the toilet knocks out cold anyone venturing near the conference room.
9. The meeting was called off permanently after the organizers of the meeting started getting life threatening calls from other creative people on not winning the Sword.
10. The room has been banned by the upper authority. Apparently, the room had to be quarantined after all the creative people got together last.
11. There’s a secret camera inside the room (which we are yet to locate).
12. We are a bunch of innocent people who don't want to handle dangerous things like swords... lest we end up murdering someone...
13. It is a conspiracy by our seniors, to make us write this awful list.
More as they come in.